i found my place, i found my people.

Albert Ng (glaringnotebook.com) successfully captured my bitchy rest face. And Tim supporting me on my first Thursday show at Laundry.


right. it’s almost the end of the month and i’m finally getting the hang of working at Laundry. i’m still trying to get used to mixing and maximizing the system, but overall, i’m gathering a list of lids that i know i will face every week and hopefully overcoming it every single time. two of them are working on channel lists which requires a tech rider, and doing soundchecks on the day of the gig. i made a different post on that before this one, so do check it out. i worded my thoughts at 1am, so excuse the temporary exasperation. temporary.

now, i’m a people person. i love to love. i like to have a good conversation just about anything and build relationships. but, like any other introverts out there, i’m content with the same few people that i get to see as much as i can, especially when the same few loves you back just as much. i haven’t been able to spend as much time with both my friends and family this month, which resulted in me feeling quite down, and i didn’t really know why until last night. i need to love these people back as much as they’ve supported me!! *cries*

my second home:

the stage on thursday(s).
my sound booth. always a mess


my new work life:


people, food, and just life in general.


this month flew by so fast. i’ve been challenged, forced to learn (in a good way), and at the same time going through a self-rediscovery. it’s like i know myself so well and yet at the same time i’m doubting it. i’ve been mostly doubting it. it happens. i just need to find a way to come back up and start kicking asses again. heck yeaa

here’s to whatever that is in store for august. i just got the lineup of events. looking good so far!

preparing for a show: the technical guide for musicians

by Albert Ng of glaringnotebook.com
by Albert Ng of glaringnotebook.com

1:35am and my brain decides to argue with a lot of things, particularly with reality. anyways, these little points are just off the top of my head (and feelings) in no particular order. if you know me well enough you’ll know that i would take a lot of detour just to make a point. i’ll try to simplify this.

1. technical rider
if you’re performing for a show particularly under an organizing committee, please do us crew a favour and take a minute to write the list of things that your band needs. the number of mics, DIs, backlines needed….all of these are important information to help you with your own show. obviously, if it was your own show, you would want everybody to take note of everything from wardrobe to song list to lights etc. if you are going to play alongside other acts/bands, doesn’t matter if your setup is small or meh, preparing a technical rider goes a long way.

here’s what happen when you don’t give me a tech rider: i stalk your facebook profile and/or fan page. it’s worse if you’re a band and you don’t even bother including your band members on your fan page. what gives?! now i have to search the entire internet for a picture of your performance somewhere -oh never mind you don’t even have a decent picture of you performing on your own fan page. it’s okay. now i have to message you.

if you don’t reply me then well, i’m sorry if we are not able to provide what you need and if that’s the case i sure hope you bring your own stuff with zero assumptions that we have “them”, whatever they are.

DO mention specifically if you are playing electric guitar or acoustic guitar. Just mentioning guitar requires an extra skill on my side that i do not have – being psychic.

DON’T tell me that you only need four mics when your band consists of 5 vocalists and you are using your own mic. list them as 5 vocals anyway; i don’t really care if you are using your own mic or not – it’s the least of my worries.

tip: i don’t mind your setlist! i would usually try to watch or listen to your past performances when i have the time.

2. soundcheck
now i know that the world isn’t all that fair and not everyone can afford to be a full time musician. soundchecks are usually done during office hour or rush hour. it’s probably unfortunate enough that you have to spend most of your weeknights practicing, right? right.

now, soundcheck isn’t all that bad (at least for me) if you’ve given me your tech rider. i can almost not forgive you if you were to make last minute changes (like “oh we’ve decided to add a djembe and a tambourine i’m sorry i forgot to tell you”) but all is well once i brainstorm within a second as to which mic ends up miking which instrument. i mean, change is inevitable right? right.

bear in mind that when you do come for soundcheck – you are able to complete two important things:

  1. achieve optimum stage level for your monitoring
  2. give the engineer to work with your balance and your tone, possibly improving them as well

so if you are not given the chance to do soundcheck:

  1. DO cooperate with the crew and sound engineer during your setup so we wouldn’t spend 10-15 minutes just figuring out who stands where.
  2. DO a 30-second soundcheck with your loudest song to crosscheck your stage level with the engineer. the engineer can only do as much as guessing.
  3. DON’T yell “i need more *whatever* in this monitor!!” in the middle of your song. at least wait until your song is over.
  4. Vocalist: DON’T point your mic down towards the monitors as it may cause feedback. if you’re more of a holding kind of person, please be watchful of the direction that you’re pointing it to.
  5. DO practice, practice, practice. i cannot stress this point enough but front-of-house engineers are not there to fix your mistakes. if you don’t know how to trust FOH engineer in charge, at least trust your own bandmates; learn listen to each other.

tip: guitarists are more than welcome to bring their own trusty ol’ amp (better with presets from practices)! the band could do the same with their own sound/tech person!

3. “spokesperson”
if all the above fails, get the person that the whole band trusts (or yourself) and walk through the details with the crew before the show. i am opened to any changes up to 5 minutes before the show. if you don’t even have a spokesperson then well, suffer the consequencesssss!!!! muahahaha


random bits of thoughts:
when i started college, i realized that the only way to survive this industry is to know how to talk and build my network. i’m, no doubt, in a “people industry”. one cannot survive without another to support and vice versa. a band may be the best of their generation but without a good sound engineer, manager or even producer the band maybe can go as far as only being the resident band of a local bar.

these days, a lot of artists are going independent. a band is sometimes their own manager, producer and even techie. i have nothing against that but how far can you go if only you and your band believe in your own product? i don’t mean to sell to make money but rather to have people to buy into your music, without having to actually buy them first.

just remember that without your listeners, you have zero support in terms of income. i wouldn’t make income my main goal, but if you understand the importance of “serving” your listeners with good (these days that means sellable) music without having to sell yourself out (AKA MUSIC IS YO LIFE YOU WOULD DO ANYTHING TO DO MUSIC YOUR WHOLE LIFE), you will do fine.

  1. point 1: if you want to be your everything, at least learn how to manage your facebook/twitter page. don’t post once every few months unless if you need to, provide the audience with a legit explanation and a timeline of when to expect your new music/show/to simply hear from you next. talk to your audience like how you would talk to a friend. anyone would appreciate that kind of “special artist-fan” connection.
  2. point 2: be humble. don’t expect a respect that you have not earned. make friends, share your music (free demos/ep/mixtapes etc), find shows to support other acts… you won’t go anywhere without other people doing the same for you.

2:32am and i’m not making sense anymore. time for me to hit the sack.

kind soul + high level of work ethic + responsibility = a good package.

am I living with ADHD?

i am blogging because right when i was about to fall asleep, my brain decided to wake me up and asks “so, how do you get diagnosed for ADHD in KL?”. argh darn that apple.

i’m not gonna be all serious about this nor do i intend on actually going to see a specialist. i actually don’t quite remember exactly/correctly how my childhood was, so i can only speak from my experience from the past 3 years – college days, until now.

let’s start with a video from a guy that has ADHD himself – ryan higa.

example 1: remembering names
i always tell people that i suck at names. not gonna lie, unless we’re gonna work with each other more or you’re a familiar face in the scene, until the next time i see you, your name will be out of my memory palace. i had a little habit of blocking out whatever that’s unimportant……most of the time. ha but i do have a knack for remembering directions!

example 2: reading
okay, i LOVE reading; no question about that. but my brain tends to travel elsewhere in the middle of a chapter which makes me go back a couple times (or more) just so i don’t miss out any details of the storyline just because i don’t understand how i get that far. in fact, let’s talk about writing. i can write this halfway through and type word for word what i wanna type but my brain would instruct my fingers to type something else. i actually typed “time” when i meant to type “type” a few words ago. gah. i love doing maths though! (wait, what) (now this is where i’d start proofreading after a really long paragraph.)

following reading & writing, i have a bad habit of daydreaming while driving as well that so many times when i had snapped out of it, i’d ask myself “ummmmm how did i get here? SAFELY?????”. but research do suggests that people with ADHD tend to drive recklessly (and possibly get into accidents from time to time). yikes.

example 3: conversations
NOPE. i suck at paying attention to conversations from beginning till the end. if you hear me say “ahuh” or “meh” or “oh well” “i don’t know” or whatever responses that doesn’t really relate to whatever that you’re saying, chances are, i didn’t pay attention. i’m sorry! i’m working on it! i remember when i was in a relationship with my last boyfriend, he’d always complaint that i would forget the things that he’d told me or that i wasn’t paying attention. ha! i guess that’s why we parted ways looooool. but seriously though, bear with me if i have problems keeping up with you. 😉

example 4: sitiing/standing still or just being still in general
nobody has ever told me to stop moving or whatever, but i can’t keep my feet from tapping, legs from dancing, head from bobbing, and hands from drumming. i mean for starters i love music so there’s no stopping me in that but i cannot sit still. i remember my mom dad were always telling me that when i was younger, i’d never wanna sit still in the car. i’d stand in the gap between the two front seats, with excuse saying “i want to see the cars!” hahahah. i still do. being short that i am, if i can sit in the front seat, i’d go for it. but i guess that’s a whole different thing altogether lol.

i love my phone though. you can’t take that away from me. hah!

example 5: time travelling
i cannot deny that i have a special talent in time-wasting. i mean, let’s talk about my life now – i work from 3pm-2am 4 days a week. i’d try to wake up at 8am everyday so i don’t feel like i had just wasted the whole day sleeping in (even though my body probably needs it more lol). and will you look at the clock…..12:33pm!

i should also add that in every bit of success in my work that i can do on my laptop, i’d give myself a reason to check facebook. “oh scrolling takes only ten seconds. my fingers could use the break from all that typing. psshhh” *10 seconds later* “wtf how did i lose 2 hours???? shit i need to get this done ASAP.”


example 6: remembering to smile
okay, in addition to not being able to keep up, i have been blessed with a bitchy rest face, so if i’m not smiling i can promise you i do NOT intend on killing you. i’m not suarez nor do i have the interest to dispose a dead body. i just…forget to smile sometimes.

example 7: keeping self busy while taking calls
this isn’t so bad. i already suck at conversations and phone calls tend to be more important than an actual conversation so i’d try my very best to drio everything and pay attention to what the other end is trying to tell me. i’d repeat the details, ask for confirmation, and then end it. that’s why i love texting more. word for word, less miscom.

example 8: the most productive closer to deadlines
hahahaha yes. i could plan up to hours before an event start and yet during soundcheck or mock rundown things get changed and i improve. i don’t even bother looking at my notes anymore. (okay not the best example). but i do work best under pressure; it just tires me out faster / more.

COLLEGE – i had rather use up my time to focus on other things like studying and practicing than to just focus on my assignment up until the week it is due. or at least before that. ha

example 9: picking out a dish from a menu
sometimes this is the exact reason why i find going to a new place to eat is a chore to me; i’d have to find my new favourite. if not, i’d order what my friends order unless i find something that i’m more familiar with. waiters, however, are good at making me feel under pressured sometimes. (kidding! i’m very good friends with a lot of waiters. thankfully these days waiters wouldn’t come to you unless you’re ready to order. 😀 )

anyone would like to challenge my test bud? you’ll have to be a special one to make me agree to this. aaaahhhhh

example 10: a pile of incomplete tasks
yea i had a lot of these problem back when i was in ICOM. there were too many new things to learn that they overwhelmed me most of the time. i carry a planner with me nowadays and i’ve been training myself to keep a checklist every now and then. i’m getting better and my mom has been asking me to teach her, which means i’m right on track! (ironically, i’ve yet to teach my mom how i do my journaling LOLZ)

example 11: leaving the room only to come back with everything else but the one thing that you need
okay, i used to have this problem. i’m not completely over it but bottom line is all these syndromes that indicate the possibility of having ADHD kinda tires me out after all these years. for this problem, i’m not so bad when i’m in a working mode. i’d tried to leave the room with one goal – to come back with what i need. i would sort of chant in my head the thing that i need, making sure that i have it, before leaving the space. i mean, place. yea. it’s still an ongoing training.

example 12: looking for your phone when your phone is in your….hand.
hah! just last night i freaked out a little bit saying that i had lost my torch light when it was just right in front of me. what am i, blind?! can’t shake this one.

example 13: not sure if you just came downstairs or about to go up.
nooooot really, but i have come across me getting frustrated for coming down stairs when i had decided to go upstairs. silly brain.

example 14: forcing self to burp to remember what was lunch
i have asked myself a few times if i had eaten or what i had. i’m always hungry so it’s a struggle. however, i cannot force myself to burp. i don’t have that gift.

example 15: thinking
lately i notice that i can talk really fast (and understand people that talk fast.) i could explain to you things from a to z and then bit my tongue and then complaint about it and come back to where i had left of and then give myself comments on what i just said and have opinions over like literally i could go on in my own world that sometimes i’d forget what i was just talking about and goes “so yeah” before i stopped talking. my mind is a wanderer.

example 16: texting
everyone, i’ve never gotten drunk before. if we text a lot and you’ve encounter some kind of drunk texting, it’s just my brain getting interference from the nearby source.

(it’s been half an hour since the last timestamp.)

example 17: memorized a phone number but the sound of the keypad distracted you and you lost all contacts of your memory palace.
my every day life. when i try to remember a line from a movie or a phrase from a conversation and i wanna type it out to share it (aka tweet/post on facebook), everything around me alters my memory and usually i’d end up giving up just from trying to remember it.

example 18: wasting shampoo from overthinking in the shower.
i’ve taught myself to daydream elsewhere but the shower. also because i share the same bathroom with 3 other siblings so we can’t afford to buy a lot of shampoo all the time lol.

example 19: can’t work in groups.
i either work better/faster on my own, or i’m the leader. sorry guys, you’re just going to have to bear with me.

example 20: the amount of reminders everywhere
sticky notes, alarms, calendar events….been there. still training my memory palace to get the hang of this.

example 21: awkward silences when talking to people.
ryan mentioned forgetting what he’s saying mid sentences, which i kinda already talk about. but between you and i and our conversation and suddenly dropping it, my brain is probably getting bored trying to keep up with you or it has wandered elsewhere. i swear i’m not trying to be rude!

example 22: very indecisive.
lately i’m slowly trying to not waste time, and it’s funny because making decisions under a pressured amount of time is hard, but once i know what i want or need, it’s hard for me to choose otherwise.

example 23: every other thought leads to another thought
already explained ^

yea i’m getting bored and hungry just typing this for almost an hour. lol

anyways, even if i do have adhd, i’m not gonna use that to defend my incapability. i mean, i’ve gotten better the past one year and if i can just keep that up i’ll be able to do my job even better for sure. can’t say i have all the answers in the world, but at least i have answers for myself.

time to get ready for work. too many words ; too lazy to proofread.